Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Setting the Record Straight: They're not all Pajama Pants

There's been some confusion in my household of late, and the issue at hand is my wardrobe. It seems my family is unable to distinguish between pajamas and other types of attire. If I only had a nickel for each time I heard a neighborhood kid whisper, "Why's your mom wearing pajama pants in the middle of the day?"

This is my attempt to clarify matters.

When one gets home from one's day job and is ready to plop down in front of the computer for some quality writing time, one dons Writing Pants (please see photo). Note that it is generally still light out and dinner has not been made, nor even thought of, at this point.

A bit later, after at least three separate parties have inquired as to the whereabouts of dinner, it's recommended that one change into one's Driving Pants (please see photo) before hopping into the car and heading to the nearest drive-through.

After dinner, when one's tummy is full and the house starts to turn a bit chilly, one generally opts for Comfy Pants (please see photo). It's worth mentioning that comfy pants, though clearly distinguishable from writing pants, are also entirely acceptable attire for writing.

Finally, when the rest of the house is asleep and one intends to be at the keyboard into the wee hours of the morning, it's the time to slip into one's Pajama Pants (please see photo). In case there were any doubt, these should never be worn out of doors (although a quick trip to the mailbox is fine) or when it's light out (an exception is made for snow days) or when company is expected (unless they live within a 15 mile radius).

So there you have it--a definitive, illustrated guide. Multiple choice quiz on Friday.


Keli Gwyn said...


How sad that your family members are unable to differentiate between your Writing, Driving, Comfy and Writing Pants. Glad you've set the record straight.

Anne Barton said...

Hi Keli! My thoughts exactly.

It's probably a good thing I can't wear flannel pajama pants to work. Then I'd have School Pants too. :)

M.B. said...

Thank you for your witty and hilarious post. I have a pair of multipurpose pants as well; they go on the minute I hit the door after I arrive home from work. My pants are cooking, writing, crafting, and lounging pants. Doesn't everyone have a pair? If not, they are missing out!

Anne Barton said...

M.B., I couldn't agree more! They are so versatile, aren't they? ;)

Today we have over a foot of snow on the ground and it's still coming down. So it turns out they're great Snow Day pants too.

Thanks so much for stopping by!

Keli Gwyn said...

Anne, I thought of you and this post today when I was in our local Kmart. A woman was wearing a pair of pants that looked a lot like these. So, it's official. This particularly versatile article of clothing also serves as Christmas Shopping Pants!